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August 21st, 2009 8:44 PM
Rufus: hold on a sec Lil, [speaking to Dan] wait so you've come to the realization that the real reason why you slept around with Miss Carr and Serena, is because you've secretly been in love with Nate? I hope you also realize that you're the LAST to find out..yea..ok now if you'll excuse me. [turns back to the phone, and starts to continue speaking to Lily]
Dan: [completely dumbfounded]...omigod, Nate knows too?!
Rufus: ugh, really Dan, you NEED to get into Gossip Girl's contacts, everybody who's anybody found out like three months ago, GAWD!
August 21st, 2009 8:32 PM
Dan: Dad, what is it?
Rufus: OMG, you're the OTHER TUCKER!
Dan: Dad we've had this conversation before, John Tucker Must Die is FICTION.
Rufus: Really? That's odd, I thought I saw Kate following me around today...
August 21st, 2009 8:05 PM
Rufus: Oh no...
Dan: What
Rufus: *farts*
Dan: Do i smell chili?
August 21st, 2009 7:20 PM
Dan: Dad, are you prank calling CeCe again?
August 21st, 2009 7:11 PM
Dan: Stop staring at the camera Dad.
Rufus: I can't, it's hypnotizing.
August 21st, 2009 6:49 PM
Rufus: No, I assure you, NO ONE in my family has ordered the "5 Steps to Get Hot Girls" DVD set! First the UPS guy doesn't believe me, and now the manager thinks I'm kidding? This is outrageous! Look buddy, I'm getting married soon, and.....oh. never mind.
Dan: Wait, what's going on, Dad?
Rufus: ...What do you mean, you want an explanation? If you looked like my son, you'd order it, too!
August 21st, 2009 6:43 PM
Rufus: Oh Lily I can't wait til we get to be alone tonight so I can caress your skin....
Dan: Dad?
Rufus: Uhh hold on to that thought Lily
August 21st, 2009 6:32 PM
Rufus: "Yeah I know, he sleeps with teachers, and is having some twisted affair with his step/half sister. I blame the parents-"
*Turns around*
Rufus: Did you want something, Dan ?
August 21st, 2009 4:46 PM
Rufus: Lily, this time we're gonna be awesome, you're gonna miss me before I have left your bedroom...oh, hi Dan, how's it going?
Dan: *whut*
August 21st, 2009 4:26 PM
Whoops made a mistake...
Rufus: (to Lily) Gossip girl said what about our love child?
Dan: Dad not you too... The kids at school are bad enough.
Rufus: (rolls eyes) Oh shut up Dan. You're just mad because I'm on it and and you're not. (Sticks out tongue)
August 21st, 2009 4:26 PM
Rufus: (to Lily) Gossip girl said what about our love child?
Dan: Dad not you too... The kids at school are bad enough.
Rufus: (rolls eyes) Oh shut up Dan. Your just mad because I'm on and and your not. (Sticks out tongue)
August 21st, 2009 4:16 PM
LOL MINA!
August 21st, 2009 4:15 PM
Rufus: What do you mean we lost in the V.M.A's??
August 21st, 2009 4:09 PM
Rufus (singing angrily while hanging up phone): Lily, Lily, had my baby and hid it from me-- *Sees Dan and slowly turns around* I mean....(sings nicer) Lily, Lily, I love you.......
[Inspired by Gossip Girl Parody from Soap.Net]
August 21st, 2009 3:59 PM
Rufus: What are you wearing....Oh you know I love that on you. I wish I just rip it off with my--
Dan: -clears throat-
Rufus: Oh! -turns around- Uh...I have to go...I'll make sure the portrait is there by Wednesday.
Dan: Is this the important business call you had to make?
Rufus: You know there's nothing I like more than taking care of um...business.
sorry. i have no clue how to format stuff.
August 21st, 2009 3:58 PM
Rufus: What are you wearing....Oh you know I love that on you. I wish I just rip it off with my--
Dan: -clears throat-
Rufus: Oh! -turns around- Uh...I have to go...I'll make sure the portrait is there by Wednesday.
Dan: Is this the important business call you had to make?
Rufus: You know there's nothing I like more than taking care of um...business.
August 21st, 2009 3:49 PM
MARRILYN** love it!!
August 21st, 2009 3:46 PM
Rufus on phone: Okay, Scott. I'll bring Lily and we'll come over in an hour.
Dan walks in: Who are you talking to?
Rufus: Well, ummm ...
Dan: No! Not you too!
Rufus: I couldn't resist. I mean he's-
Dan: No. Dad just, no.
Rufus: You have to understand, I love him.
Dan: No, Dad! Nate's just going to break up with you.
August 21st, 2009 3:14 PM
Rufus:Dan, I'm just on the phone with a girl who says that she has got eight boxes of mustard for Mr.Humphrey. Anything you would like to tell me?
August 21st, 2009 3:02 PM
Michelle and just made my day! LOL
August 21st, 2009 1:45 PM
Rufus: So I was like NO HE DID NOT and she was like YES HE DID TOO and it was soo totally retarded and then I was all like --
Dan: Dad?
Rufus: Uhhhh and don't forget to tune the guitar while you're at it, thanks I'll pick it up thursday.
Dan: . . . I don't wanna know.
August 21st, 2009 1:43 PM
"I'll call you back, Dan ate all my ice cream!"
August 21st, 2009 12:54 PM
Secret Admirer: I'm comming!
Rufus: Where are you now, my secret admirer? *-*
Dan: In front of you!
Rufus: D:
August 21st, 2009 12:51 PM
Rufus: Whoa.
Dan: Do you like it?
Rufus: I don't think blue mascara really goes with that shirt.
Dan: Damn. Did you make my botox appointment?
Rufus: Just on the phone to them now. Really lovely people.
Dan: Thanks Dad, you're the best.
August 21st, 2009 12:22 PM
Dan: Hey, Dad. Who're you talking to?
Rufus: Uh, no one...
A Voice: I resent being called no one! Now, are you going to sell your soul to me or not?
Dan: Wait, are you talking to the Devil?
Rufus: YES! ...I can't believe he walked in on THIS of all conversations...must salvage remaining shreds of parental dignity! ...Young lady, don't make me tell your mother what you've been up to! She IS going to be guesting soon after all.