Blair: (sees Chuck, smoking) Oh, don't stop on my account.Chuck: Oh I had to, second hand smoke is bad for the uh...
Blair: I'm not pregnant. So goodbye mistake, so far in my past I can hardly remember it.
Chuck: You cannot be serious.
Blair: You can't be touching me. Look, if you were going to tell Nate, you would have done so in Monaco but you don't want him to hate you. Game over.
Chuck: Game's not over until I say it is.
Blair: Then go play with yourself.
• Episode: A Thin Line Between Chuck and Nate • Rating: 9.8 / 10 • Permalink
Serena: I need to talk to you.
Chuck: About getting knocked up? I must say I was a little disappointed you weren't more careful.
• Episode: A Thin Line Between Chuck and Nate • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Serena: Hi, Chuck.
Chuck: Please, call me brother.
• Episode: A Thin Line Between Chuck and Nate • Rating: 9.8 / 10 • Permalink
Serena: There's no moving on just yet. The pregnancy test wasn't for me, it was for Blair.
Chuck: What?
Serena: She won't take it. So, given that if she's pregnant and you're the father...
Chuck: No! We used a condom.
Serena: Well, obviously it broke.
Chuck: What's obvious is that your best friend has kept you in dark.
Serena: What are you talking about?
Chuck: I handle my business. Apparently, Nate doesn't.
• Episode: A Thin Line Between Chuck and Nate • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Gossip Girl: Who knew B and C were such patrons of the arts? Call it philanthropy or bribery, it looks like everyone has their price.
• Episode: School Lies • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Vanessa: You're sick!
Chuck: You're welcome!
• Episode: School Lies • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Chuck: Poor little Humphrey Dumpty. Look, let me clarify something for you. Regardless of who you're currently sleeping with, you and I come from different worlds. In my world, if I'm suspended or expelled, a wing is donated in the Bass name.
Dan: That sounds like quite a world.
Chuck: It's not perfect, I'll admit.
• Episode: School Lies • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Chuck: [to Dan] What do the Humphreys have to offer? Your dad's cassingle?
• Episode: School Lies • Rating: Unrated • Permalink
Chuck: You know, if my dad and your mom come back from South Africa tomorrow engaged we'll be brother and sister. And you know what they say, the family that plays together stays together.
Serena: Ah. Incest, the universal taboo. One of the, uh, only ones you haven't violated.
Chuck: I'm game if you are.
• Episode: School Lies • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Blair: Isn't there someone else you can torture?
Chuck: Probably, but I choose you.
• Episode: School Lies • Rating: 10.0 / 10 • Permalink
Total Quotes: 140



